Living the Retirement Dream in Rural Thailand
One of the
questions I’m most often asked in Thailand is how and why I ended up living
here. Even those who have known me for many years are slightly surprised by where
I now live in a rural Thai village in the northeast of the country, with no
other westerners nearby. Let me explain.
Falling in Love with Thailand
Most in that category know I was destined to end up in the Land of Smiles. I first visited on a two-week break in September 2004. Back then, I told my mate Steve, who taught in the Bangkok suburbs, that I would one day call it home, within about an hour of landing at Don Muang Airport.
The people, the buzz of Bangkok, and the atmosphere of feeling respected, safe, and welcome sucked me in immediately. Eventually, I could make the move, with personal circumstances, finances, age, and restrictions surrounding the worldwide pandemic being in my favour at the age of 56 in November 2021.
I’d been so many times over the intervening years that I felt like a local, meeting lots of friends over for cricket tournaments or those who lived around the country. Lots of planning had gone in beforehand, as well as endless hours researching places that I wanted to find out about and stay in.
You see, I am anything but a run-of-the-mill expat. I am an explorer who wanted to integrate and live life as much like a native Thai as possible.
Sure, I
still enjoy the occasional western treat, but I try to live as much like a
local Thai as possible. It allows my money to go further, and I get a true sense of my surroundings, rather than living somewhere just for the weather and to take advantage of the lower cost of living.
| Local Cycle at Sunset |
Meeting Taew
How can I do this? Well, I was fortunate to meet an amazing woman called Wirongwrong, or Taew, to give her the nickname each Thai is given by their family. She quickly realised I was like no foreigner she’d met before, and she’d met plenty as the owner of a bar and restaurant in Minburi, a few kilometres north of Suvarnabhumi Airport.
We were initially friends, hitting it off straight away. She took an interest in my unusual trips away, or me visiting places off the beaten track around Bangkok that were off the radar for most farangs, as we westerners are called by Thais. She made me food I’d never heard of, and her friends and staff taught me phrases, some of which were useful, some of which were designed for mischief.
She took me for rides in the car for a few hours before opening her establishment at 4 pm, which, looking back, was a sure sign she liked me, as it meant an incredibly long day for her, rarely getting home until gone midnight. I saw places most tourists would never think to visit, and as someone without transport who cannot ride a motorbike or drive a car, it was much appreciated.
Discovering Rural Sisaket
Our relationship grew naturally, with her Thai friends telling us both we should be an item. That came in time, as I realised I was falling in love and was extremely jealous on the occasions she was getting close attention from other male customers. Plenty of overnight trips were next before I was introduced to Taew’s family in rural Sisaket, which was a real eye opener, both location-wise and in how locals lived.
Building a Life in Ban Suan Kluai
Fast forward to March 2023, after an extension had been put on the bungalow, which she was in the process of paying off, located on the large family plot in the village of Ban Suan Kluai, just over 20 km southeast of Sisaket city, we were married and moved in.
We kept the small condo back in Minburi, which I paid off, offering us somewhere to stay next to my wife’s younger sister whenever we wanted to visit the capital without paying for a hotel.
It is something that wouldn’t suit everyone. In fact, very few others I know. The village may have a population of 300, and we are on the edge of it. Taew’s dad lives in a raised cabin; her mum sleeps in the bungalow, but most of their lives are spent outdoors, with my good lady in the garden several hours each day.
She wanted to go home, and she makes the most of it every day, while I feel the benefit. On her plot, she grows around thirty different types of fruit, vegetables, and herbs. The family has rice paddies up the road and keeps egg-laying hens as well as cattle. We are not a long way from being self-sufficient. I eat natural foods unharmed by pesticides.
| View from our Vernada |
Adapting to Thai Village Life
My bicycle is my means of transport unless I go walking. I exercise at least once a day and feel physically and mentally healthy as ever. The country lanes and villages have their own unique beauty, often with lakes, as the fields change colours with the seasons.
The people who live here are equally beautiful in nature, with their warm smiles and genuine curiosity as to what a foreigner is doing cycling through. Many have become familiar faces, such as the owners of small shops.
I’d lived in London for over twenty years after leaving the seaside town of Scarborough to try and improve my life and find decently paid work that I’d never enjoyed in my birthplace. Most of my time in the capital was spent working, looking after those travelling by train for TfL as an employee of London Underground, eventually becoming a Customer Service Supervisor.
It was well paid, and they were good employers, but the shift work could be tiring, while some situations were extremely stressful, on top of dealing with the loss of both my parents within five years of each other.
I have made sure that I have my visa and have taken the time and effort to acquire a Thai ID card and a yellow house book as proof that I am a permanent resident at home, while offering me peace of mind. They are not 100% essential, but I vowed that I would do everything properly if I were to move here.
I have also spent plenty on the house and on making sure my wife enjoys each day. The same as any relationship around the world. I make sure that her parents have food and anything that they need, not that they are needy in any way.
Here in the countryside of Sisaket, I can relax. The many members of our extended Thai family, along with the people of our village, have taken me in, and I have built friendships with them. It has taken plenty of effort on my part. Not a lot of English is spoken here, so I have learned to communicate as well as I can in Thai.
Fortunately, Taew has a decent command of my native tongue and helps me and vice versa in speaking English and Thai, ensuring communication is not a problem. We generally understand each other, and when difficulties occur, we turn to Google Translate, an invaluable tool, while my conversational vocabulary continually improves.
A big reason for my acceptance is that I make a big effort, attending as many local occasions as possible, and once there, I mix with others. I always make a point of going outside and saying “Sawasdee”, a traditional hello greeting, when I see yet another person coming into the garden to see the in-laws.
A typical day for me involves waking around 6 am, and going out on the bicycle before the temperature rises, returning home to catch up with the news and overnight sports results from the UK. I do some writing, do some puzzles or get on with editing the next video for my YouTube Channel, before Taew brings me breakfast around 10 am.
If we are not going anywhere, I’ll do some more of the reading and watch TV, followed by a siesta. Afternoon can see more exercise, sometimes going to a café, and most recently recording an audio version of my published book entitled, Touring Thailand with Thais, before relaxing on our veranda with a movie, or finally catching up with a series I never got round to watching over dinner. I’m usually in bed by 10 pm.
| Home, Sweet Home |
Why Some Foreigners Struggle
Taew has told me that lots of people make a point of telling her I am different compared to the other foreigners who’ve passed through the village with their partners, whose families still live here. Many see it as a hardship and won’t try to communicate, eat the local food or laugh and smile, giving the game away that they would rather not be there.
Finding Happiness in Retirement
I’m no hero, and I know we’re all different. This is my home now. I love sitting at my desk and writing articles for my football blogs as well as the pieces contained on here. I listen to music, watch sports from Thailand and Europe on TV, as well as attending as many events as possible, often with an overnight stop every few weeks as a couple.
I am still involved with cricket, assisting in the coordination of events in Chiang Mai and Koh Chang, where Taew has also made friends with the others who attend, with her assisting behind the bar at a couple of them. They, along with my day at football and golf each week, are things I look forward to and make them special, in the nice company of friends, enjoying food and drink before heading back into the long grass.
I’ve seen firsthand and heard countless stories of farangs who’ve moved to Thailand and tried to live every day as a party, often ending in misery or even death. Burnout, illness, alcoholism, drug dependency, mental health issues, and financial issues, often caused by hooking up with the wrong partner, are all underlying reasons.
I am a lucky man and want to enjoy my fortune as long as I can. Once we reach 60 years of age, we slow down, and our bodies take longer to recover after having a blast. I manage it by adapting and looking after myself. It might be considered dull, but different strokes for different folks, as the song goes. I have found my ideal haven.
To live in Thailand, I would advise the following. Try to integrate, as you never know what you are missing out on until you give something a try. Thais are incredible people, especially to those who want to reach out. Try to find hobbies so that going for drinks is looked forward to rather than a habit, and finally, if you find the right woman, from a good family, look after her and don’t let her go.
Follow these tips, with an open mind, while trying to see things through the eyes of a Thai rather than a Westerner, and I believe you will not go far wrong.
If you enjoyed this story, feel free to check out my YouTube Channel, where I share videos about everyday life in Thailand, local football, and travel across the country.
Thanks for
reading.
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